Thursday, May 14, 2009

At times, you should let 'em fall



It’s been well over a month & finally I’ve got the time to sit back and do the things I’d long been waiting to do- one of which was to get back to blogging. I was reading some article in this magazine yesterday which stated - "We need never be ashamed of our tears” & as always I am unable to figure out why that’s such a difficult concept for some people to grasp! I don’t see how certain people can actually hold such emotions back. Because without emotion, and no- I'm not talking about crying at everything, you're simply a mindless automaton. I think we all have been in a way socialised into not crying. But I think tears give you this outlet to let go of a multitude of pent up emotions in a very positive manner. We are all humans, after all . And the very thought, caused me to think -“What is it then that’s actually worth somebody’s tears?”

People seem to have varying notions for that matter, like when you put your heart and soul into something to make it work & it just doesn't work out- like a relationship perhaps. At times, to love, yet not be loved in return. It's certainly okay to cry fondly over memories of good times shared, to shed a tear at the memory of the point it all changed & it's definitely okay to cry white-hot tears of anger at the other party's complete refusal to see how it all went wrong. It's perfectly acceptable to cry with fear at being alone again, at facing your multitude of problems without that same backup to rely on anymore.

But it’s a different question altogether that I heard someone put up the other day- “Is it then ok to cry over spilt milk?” Nooo! Most people allow things to affect them even when such things are out of their control [I did.] But when it's over and done with & you can't affect it any more, so why worry? There's nothing that can be done. No amount of tears will bring the milk back into the glass.

Likewise, if you can't change something, why bother what-iffing? (if only this was as easily done as said) I being a sensitive creature do shed tears occasionally, but now I know that dwelling pointlessly on your past misfortunes isn’t a very good idea [Thank God! I eventually realized that.] The realization that the reason for which you have long been upset ain’t there anymore is such a big relief in itself. That’s when an obstinate voice in your head tells you not to waste saltwater on something that has been flawed for so long.

People who know me well, know that I am tender enough. My sister actually offers to gift me a tissue box every now & then. She’s glad she didn’t really need to do that over the last 6 months or so. Even though they say - "you should never cry for someone" (not something), for the one who actually cares for you will see that you never cry & the one who doesn’t- simply doesn’t deserve those tears, yet I believe that there are some days when you just need to cry, like the ones when you are in bed, wrapped in your blanket at night, and tears just flow down your cheeks because all the beauty fills you to the brim and then it starts to leak out through your tears, reminding you of the fact that no matter what happens, you are still blessed.

Last Monday was one of those days for me. Some days the tears will come because of some joy that, for an instant in time, seems so perfect it can't be true. At other times, you cry over bad choices or things regretted in life.

I've spent a good amount of time doing the latter as well, but not lately, for I’ve come to accept that it was all in God’s plan for my life. Going on for too long and being upset about something that you can't change is a different beast. But just crying? A few tears never hurt anyone. It’s just an expression of how your body is feeling. Sometimes it’s good to just let these tears flow & let them cleanse your soul- that usually cleans the air...

Now everything about this crying business reminds me of this one thing which always put me to tears----Yeah, I'm talking about chopping onions ;)

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